Well, I was right about one thing. Inserting prurient keywords into my most recent blog-post heading certainly ensured that my post attracted a wider audience. Who’d have thought that so many would be interested in the term, ‘female ejaculation’ ?

Inundated, swamped, teeming, flooded, none of these words seems to adequately describe the tsunami of responses, comments and hits that my inbox is struggling with. It is truly staggering.

Admittedly most of those who were attracted to my experimental post expressed their bitter disappointment at the lack of images and video clips depicting the subject matter. (To be clear, there are none.) I have had to suffer a considerable amount of abuse, two broken (cyber) windows and a death threat.

The site moderator asked me to review my post title and my position. The Turkish authorities have expressed a concern at my online activity (I didn’t think that through did I?). My employer (how did they find it?) is demanding a written explanation and apology (for what, they didn’t say.)

At the last count my blog hits had actually trebled when compared with hits received for earlier posts. Typically, my initial forays into the world of blogging were averaging one hit each (I have to admit that this was me checking up on myself). Including a smutty phrase in the title saw me reach the dizzying heights of three blog hits and a whole load of trouble. Live and learn.

Seriously – what the hell do I have to do around here to get noticed?